Most of us have lived our entire lives believing rejection was awful and that “No” was something that should be minimized if it could not be avoided entirely. However, if you read my post titled “You Must Fail to Succeed,” you may now be feeling that in order to succeed, all you have to do is tolerate failure and rejection and be willing to hear “No” more often.
While I’m willing to concede that this approach will immediately and dramatically increase your level of success, let me be abundantly clear: I don’t want you to tolerate failure; I don’t want you to fight through hearing the word “No”. I want you to like it… In fact, I want you to learn to love it.
Love rejection?
Love hearing “No”?
That’s right! Believe it or not, rejection does not have to be awful. And hearing “No” does not have to be annoying. In fact, with the proper perspective, you’ll discover that hearing “No” can actually be amusing, exciting, energizing and empowering!
You should actually be seeking rejection and failure and increasing the number of “No’s” you are hearing.
Imagine what would happen if you decided to let every rejection you encountered empower you rather than deflate you?
What if you decided to love “No”?
I recognize that to get to the point where you honestly love hearing “No” or for that matter- even enjoy hearing “No” will take some time and a lot of mental reprogramming. With this understanding, I hope that by challenging you to love “No”, that you will at least be willing to open your mind long enough to let me share with you the impact that failure and rejection have on success.
As you begin your journey to Love hearing “No”, I’m sure that you’ll acknowledge that we all have the ability to fail. This is where we all start. Unfortunately, our intense desire to avoid failure at all costs keeps most of us stuck at this level. As a result, most never move past this basic level.
Even so, you will find that some individuals ARE able to develop the willingness to fail. This typically occurs as they come to accept failure as the natural byproduct of success. Unfortunately, most are unable to sustain this willingness for any extended period of time.
However, if you persist long enough, you’ll ultimately discover that it is possible to develop the desire to fail. Having a true desire to fail goes beyond the mere tolerance or acceptance of failure as a part of life; gaining the desire to fail requires complete faith that personal and financial growth will follow, consequently; very few individuals ever develop a true desire to fail.
But, if you are one of those very rare individuals who develops a true desire to fail, you’ll quickly see the fruit of personal and financial growth which will follow. Consequently, you’ll ultimately ascend to a level where you’ll strive to fail bigger and faster. You’ll come to feel that if failing is good, then failing faster is better. You’ll ultimately strive to increase your failure rate going after BIG goals that are worthy of the effort.
Eventually you’ll get to a point where you’ll strive to fail exponentially. This is really a function of team leadership for those rare individuals who understand that massive success requires multiplication of effort. These individuals enlist other people to fail with and for them; knowing that if individual failure means individual success, then group failure means team or group success.
Most individuals spend their entire career having the ability to fail but don’t even do that very often. Through this and subsequent posts, I hope to motivate you to at least become willing to fail. In so doing you will immediately increase your success. If you can then let this increase in success work within you; you will ultimately commit yourself to the long term process that is necessary to get to where you truly desire to hear “No”.
To live a truly fulfilling life you need to learn to experience all failure and all success with equal enjoyment. If you only enjoy success, you will only enjoy part of the journey. We begin to succeed when we learn how to fail. And when you learn to enjoy failing you can enjoy your entire life.
Besides, what’s the point in pursuing something that is easily obtained? There’s always less joy in reaching the top of the mountain only to discover that everyone else is already there. It is the difficulty of success that makes it rewarding. So quit wishing that success were easier and appreciate the difficulty, pain and struggle involved.
Setting unrealistic expectations will only create frustration and lead to a decrease in the number of calls you make or chances you take.
But when you “Go For No”, the process get’s turned inside out because the expectation and the goal is to increase the number of “No’s”, not decrease them. Therefore every time you obtain a “No”, it is not a frustration but merely a realization of the objective and therefore becomes a positive. And because it’s a positive, you can do what only a small percentage of people do when they get a no; you can celebrate.
Now you might be saying okay, I understand this yes/no failure/success stuff. Do you really?
And in the case that you have understood and mentally internalized this concept, what would a review of your daily actions reveal? Would such a review show that the concepts have crystallized to the point that the result is consistent use of this tool? Or has your understanding ended with just understanding but no action?
Realize that understanding without action may be suggestive of an inadequate “no-quotient” which I will discuss in greater detail in my next post. Until then, start to embrace failure and love hearing “No”.
P.S. If you don’t want to face failure and rejection, but still want to succeed, check out this simple approach to earning money Facebook.
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